MLK Talks 'New Phase' Of Civil Rights Struggle, 11 Months Before His Ass...

 To Whom it May Concern;

INTRODUCTION: Somewhere I read “due to the incomplete service records, VA has a heightened duty to assist, as well as to consider the benefit-of-the-doubt rule and alternative sources of information.” 

This Veterans’ entire personnel file wasn't associated with or made part of my claims folder (C-File) until March 5, 2007 at the earliest and March 13, 2008 at the latest, consistent with official documentation. The latter is the MAPD date, whatever that means. Clearly then, this formal written request to reopen the disallowed claim decided March 3, 2005 is at least credible and capable of substantiation and evidence which is new and relevant has been submitted as part of this claims package. That decision remains unappealed. Included in this claim in that sense, then,you’ll find evidence which is both new and relevant. Public Laws as codified in Title 38 U.S. Code,  38 CFR, M21-1 and other jurisprudential res such as precedential opinions and landmark cases were consulted in the making of this saga-rich dissertation by the way and if ya gotta be nuts might as well have a little fun at it I say. Im such a retarded idiot. Remember please that I am not claiming entitlement to benefits based on service connection for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I know, I know, the Disability Benefits Questionnaire (DBQ) my VA doctor filled out? Welll, I supplied him with the wrong damn DBQ form. Please don’t deny my claim for much needed benefits just for using the wrong form.  

EXPLANATION: Speaking to the primary issue first and that is whether my current symptomatology and/or diagnosis are, in fact, related to service. This was a basis for denial decision dated March 3, 2005. A September1988 performance report shows behavior problems requiring counseling. I was also counseled in 1991 for impulsivity and again sometime during 1992 for odd behavior such as creating stressful situations when completing routine tasks (see performance evaluation dated 16 Oct 92 which describes a referral to outside agencies i.e. someone with psychological expertise in the medical field.) Improvement was made the same report also noted. I never got very high marks but there were good years interspersed where my symptomatology subsided temporarily and I would behave more within normal limits. Looking at the record showing I was a dormitory manager from 17 Oct 92 to 30 Jun 94. That place was sort of a staging ground for those “wayward” troops like me, just waiting for their inevitable Court Martial date or their discharge date after being evaluated by a Medical Evaluation Board (MEB). You see, I came under investigation while on active duty with the U.S. Air Force by the Office of Special Investigations (OSI) for “improperly disposing” of Top Secret Cryptographic keying material, had my security clearance suspended, and was reassigned to temporary duty as a dormitory manager pending the results of the investigation which wound up taking at least a year, nearest I can glean from reports dated in 1992 & 1993.  Eventually, truth owing to reason, cooler heads prevailed and I was exonerated,  returned to my regularly assigned work center and had my Top Secret security clearance reinstated. 6 months to a year passed uneventfully and I was reassigned to Tinker AFB down in Midwest City, Oklahoma in January 1995.

It was an unimaginably stressful event or occurrence during which I separated from my family. A Lieutenant Jackson [testified] in the same evaluation describing my mental state this way, “personal problems affected duty performance.” Facing near certain court martial, busted down to E-1 and military prison they take that shit seriously, I thought I was doomed for sure.Pretty damn bleak prospects at that time I remember man the weight on my shoulders when I think back on it holy crap Batman…and on a (not yours) timeline kyna vibe man that was some seriously distressing time I did at Offutt. I am still paying a psychological cost over it but have largely learned to let it go. Result? I’ve been known to go completely off the rails when someone says or insinuates I committed a wrong when in fact I didn’t. Perhaps that type of in your face type behavior.  Though I abhor unnecessary violence, I fiercely stick to my guns. Unfortunately, I have re-lived that morning in the Satellite Communications Node (SCN) so many times I’d rather not keep track. I have benefitted from  some easing off lately of one crippling psychiatric symptom and that happens to be night terrors. Worse than nightmares. Both my physical and psychiatric symptoms have worsened significantly and I submit new and relevant medical and lay evidence to support such an assertion. Extreme paranoia and avoidance or isolationist type symptoms persist cyclically. Rapidly cycling mood swings that is. Psychoses seem to wax and wane as does my overall level of anxiety and depression. Outside of a small group of friends and allies, I pretty much keep to myself. I realize in full measure that I am quite impaired. 

I’m just a lay person not competent to testify with respect to diagnosing illnesses, however, I’ve learned through research that impulsivity is a core feature of bipolar disorder & schizoaffective disorder - bipolar type; both of which I carry as diagnoses. The way I understand it is I suffer from features of schizophrenia, mania, depression and psychosis which encodes to schizoaffective disorder - bipolar type most recent episode depressed which happens to be my current diagnosis. 

What I’m trying to say is that I’ve come to understand and, after thoroughly reviewing all the evidence presently on record, including that pertinent to service, conclude that in fact had those performance reports been received and associated with my claims folder coincident with a disallowed claim decided on March 3, 2005. I’ve submitted documentary evidence showing the reports were associated with my C-File no earlier than 2007 or as an O18 PIES request for my “entire” personnel file subsequent to a PTSD claim decided finally in the spring of 2008. May 22nd. 

There are, however, times that I lose my appetite and lose weight. Ranging from 190 - 290 and back and forth numerous times post service. Partly to blame is medication side effects (Risperidone Const) and I’m sure my diet sucks. I think I eat to ameliorate the debilitating and horrific depths  of  some powerful god dam depression; part and parcel of the condition. 

Basis: Historical and contemporary symptomatology have caused severe disabilities insofar as  those symptoms have resulted in functional impairment and loss of enjoyment in life which is, by definition,  a disability accordant to Veterans’ case law. 

I also seem to have trouble concentrating, get confused at times and make poor decisions. I do feel sad or down quite a lot especially during depressive periods. About 40% of the time. I frequently view myself as veritably useless to society and place a burden upon the shoulders of others, especially my family members. Irritability is sometimes an issue especially during incapacitating flare-ups and that depends on the types of activities I had been involved in. The pain is the worst imaginable sometimes like when mowing the lawn or doing dishes, vacuuming and the like. My thinking seems to be disturbed sometimes and this usually strikes others as odd or bizarre and occasionally even scary to them.I seem to experience more heartburn, stomach aches and headaches when I am in a depressed state.

Additionally, I have suffered from the consequences (socially and vocationally)of my diagnosed delusional disorder such as embarrassment or drawing the scorn of others. I am sometimes difficult to be around due to a foul mood which can persist for days or weeks but no longer usually.

Sometimes I have anxiety or panic attacks and feel a sense of doom. Its a very dark place. Scary too. Fortunately, these attacks have attenuated as I age.  I sometimes require assistance with my functioning - more during depressive episodes or dark states of mind. Which is humiliating and it makes me feel like im helpless or inadequate or don't carry my own weight.  

I do not now and have never suffered from or experienced hallucinations or heard voices in my head. I guess I’m lucky on that front. However, I talk to myself out loud a lot which makes me look like a nutjob. Especially in crowded places so i avoid them id rather spend time alone that with others usually.  I oftentimes feel lonely as I live alone and have difficulties holding down a job to keep me busy. I haven’t been able to engage in substantially gainful employment since about 2001 give or take.

These symptoms seem to have come on in full force and effect gradually over the years but I feel as though they began in service as reflected in my performance evaluations. They’re pretty telling if you ask me. Onset of symptomatology associated with a psychiatric disorder is considered the date the disease began. It’s origin or etiology. These are called prodromes or warning signs of things to happen down the line such as further development of the condition or  a formal diagnosis(es) of a psychiatric disorder or disease. I.e. schizoaffective disorder - bipolar type, bipolar depression and panic disorder to name just a few. Symptoms associated with a psychiatric diagnosis can become progressively worse over time. My performance evaluations (12 over 12 years of service) contain medical and Lay evidence such as being treated (counseled) by mental health referral agencies and then showing improvement. No diagnosis was made during service, however, even a lay person can record or describe what they saw or experienced. Note that my behavior became more and more suspect over the years and my duty performance was continually subpar, barely meeting standards. 

 

To that end, then, I would like to clarify that I am seeking entitlement to direct service connection for an “acquired psychiatric disorder” to include schizoaffective disorder - bipolar type, delusions and paranoia among others. I contend that I contracted a mental disorder sometime after enlistment but prior to my 1998 separation from the Air Force. I was also accused of compromising Top Secret cryptographic keying material which was quite emotionally traumatic as I faced life in prison during the pendency of an ensuing investigation. I was eventually cleared of any wrong doing, given my security clearance back and no longer worked in relegated dorm management. But the damage was done by then. Having met the 3 prong Shedden test of 1) a current diagnosis (diagnosis in 2005 was bipolar disorder - type 1 with psychosis) primarily. It later became Schizoaffective Disorder - bipolar type. Dr. Weldon at the Des Moines VA diagnosed it back around 2016 or so. 2) an incident(s) or event(s) occurred in service and 3) A nexus, or relationship between them.. In this case, there exists a relationship to service because the symptoms are the same now as they were then albeit more severe. Service connection is warranted in  this case after a review of all relevant evidence inclusive of lay statements documented in the record (performance reports) as well as any new and relevant information or evidence which supports this claim. The whole body of it. Old and new information alike so as to see the whole disability picture in the setting of mental illness.  

Finally, although this is not in any way a CUE Motion, how could VA decision makers make such a colossal error such as not making at least a modicum of effort to secure my service personnel records and associate them with my claims folder. The C-File as it were. That didn’t happen according to documentary evidence in my D-File of an O18 request for my entire personnel file pursuant to a PTSD claim. The record shows VA received those records containing the evaluations and they appear to be associated with my claims folder on or about March 23, 2008. Three years later? How could agency decision makers have reviewed and considered such key evidence which serves to substantiate my claim when they were not yet associated with my claims folder. Page 2 of a March 3, 2005 rating decision did not show that my military service records including the performance reports were considered because they are not on the list of evidence used. Seems like a mistake to me but I’m not concerned in the least about that right now, I’m simply trying to relate my current diagnosis or symptomatology to that which I displayed in service, particularly and specifically beginning in 1988 when the record reflects a statement by my supervisor and his boss at RAF Lakenheath, England that I was argumentative and that I caused disharmony in the workplace. This fact, I believe, represents a symptom of a mental disorder - initially and formally diagnosed in April 2003 as manic-depression now called bipolar disorder. I am afflicted with the more severe type 1.  I contend that my currently diagnosed psychiatric disorder is related to service as described in my performance evaluations throughout the years. The very fact those records show in service instances of repeated counseling on my behavior including by way of mental health agencies. According to an October 1992 report while stationed at Offutt AFB. i.e…these descriptions of my behavior and conduct amount to competent lay evidence of the in service inception of a psychiatric disease later diagnosed formally by Va providers, whatever they may have been at the time. Now I suffer from Bipolar depression and psychosis, among other symptoms associated with those in service as they  likely share the same etiology, I’ve learned. Though a lay person is like myself is not qualified to make a diagnosis, we can describe what we saw or what I subjectively experienced. The debilitating symptoms I experience and suffer from, mirror those I experienced during service. I contend that the signs and symptoms I exhibited during service are at least analogous to known symptomatology inherent in the variously diagnosable psychiatric diseases and are therefore related. It follows then, that I experienced the onset and progression of a serious psychiatric disorder and its’ concomitant symptoms. It just didn’t become fully and accurately diagnosed until after service. The various symptoms I would display during service as documented in my performance reports support a later diagnosis (April 2003), regardless of the absence of in service diagnosis or treatment, by a mental health professional. At that time I was given a diagnosis of manic-depression turned bipolar disorder - type 1 turned currently as schizoaffective disorder - bipolar type. But that seems to be splitting hairs. An insignificant detail. 

Conclusions: I was suffering during service from the effects of a serious psychiatric disorder which was diagnosed post-service (2003). I was treated medically for this as yet to be named psychiatric disorder during service by way of counseling from my superiors and from referral to (mental health) providers and being evaluated on June 22, 1994 by the Offutt AFB hospital Mental Health clinic. There is no statutory or regulatory requirement of an inservice diagnosis or treatment for a mental disorder or disease. Hence the STR’s being silent for any such diagnosis or treatment. I assert that it is also irrelevant that my psychiatric profile during service was normal. Nothing exists in the record showing any psychiatric disorder existed prior to service so I was presumed sound and fit for duty. The disease, at this juncture, had not become manifest until I was approximately 21 years of age as indicated in my service personnel file and it appears that the undiagnosed yet present psychiatric disorder or disease of the mind became self-evident around 1992 or so during a tour of duty at Offutt AFB in Nebraska. I was 25. The ideal age of onset of bipolar disorder and others is 18 to 30 as I understand it. That seems more plausible than it originating after 1998 and post service when I was 31, which is what one VA Examiner (McNeil) seemed to contend as, in his view, my STR’s were in fact silent for bipolar disorder or any other diagnosis in the context of behavioral health but that, in itself, should not preclude the existence of lay and medical evidence. It was there it was just not officially diagnosed until April 2013 as manic-depression (bipolar disorder). It seems at least as likely as not that my current diagnosis as well as the contemporaneous symptomatology are related and, it follows that there exists a nexus, or link, between the symptoms I would exhibit during service and the disease and symptoms that I experience presently. So, then, the 3 element Shedden criteria have been met and direct service connection is warranted and, as such, may be granted.